ReIncarnation

 I am in an induced state of being,

in a state that feels surreal at times.

all forgotten and freeing,

subtly through life's chimes. 

I remember the past glory,

and the strength in my armour.

But today I am part of the story,

and a forgotten charmer. 

I feel like an old man, 

in a young man's life.

Living a young man's life,

through an old man's eyes.

When did it all go away,

When did you let it go?

It seems so elusive now,

fleeting at your fingertips.

Time to recenter oneself,

recalibrate and reincarnate.

Wipe away the old verses,

write down new stanzas.

Like this one,

and keep some of the old.

But refresh and rejuvenate. 

Reiterate and redeem.

Lets flip things around,

and make no sense of it.

Lets ask more questions,

and answer those unanswered ones. 

Lets be in a haste,

and not let any moment go waste.

Let us hold hands,

and surge ahead.

It is time to forgive oneself,

for the past got you until this moment.

To unlock the next phase,

please say the following phrase in 3  different languages:

Bloop. Bleep. Whackadoodle. 

Infinite

What do you know about the infinite?

About everything that could ever have been.

All the different permutations

And combinations.

Did you ever think it would be this one way?

One without one. 

One too far from the sun. 

Did you ever think you could escape?

Of all the possibilities,

And realities,

You live this one.

One without one.

Too far away from the sun. 

Dark and unforgiving,

Painful reliving.

What do you know about the infinite?

Do you ever think of everything you know?

Of all the books you ever read?

And the movies you watched? 

Or art that made you feel? 

Do you think about who you are?

And who you were when you watched those movies?

Or read those books or admired those creations? 

Movies and books mean different things to you,

Art makes you feel something new each time you witness it,

Each word written, each stroke of the brush,

Means something you haven’t felt before.

It is the infinite. 

One without one.

Another day around the sun. 

And so goes another year,

And a decade or a lifetime,

Relive them all, reread those books,

Rewatch those movie and revisit those places.

Because you are not you,

You are something new. 

Don’t miss out the first time,

And don’t forget to relive it either.

It is time.

How I have missed you?

Being a part of you.

Feeling things long lost,

tasting a forgotten memory.

Why be elusive?

Why be someone else?

Why care about the world?

Lets burn it all down,

Let take each thing apart,

one by one.

Let us rebuild it all anew. 

Let us recreate, remould. 

Sit up now,

time to wake up. 

You have been drugged for far too long,

The haze is waning,

Numbness fading. 

It is all coming back.

Look up now,

Nobody's here. 

Nobody ever was. 

Or has been. 

Or ever will.

It is just you,

and will always be,

Just you.

Stand up now.

Scream into the void.

Shout it out loud,

and walk away.

For this nothingness will never remember,

will never respond. 

So take what is yours,

burn them old bridges,

and memories,

and hopes.

Let's dream again.

And this time, 

Let us not care. 

Lets go back to the place, 

when you started,

and undo everything. 

Let us rebuild.

Relearn.

Recreate. 

Reclaim. 

It is time. 

Remembrance

You know you’re alive,
For now,
In this place and time.
You sense it too,
It’s too short awhile,
People and places,
Happiness and feelings,
Moments and memories,
Everything dies.
But is not enough time,
To commit each line,
Into this world,
Give it life.
Each word read,
A lifetime felt,
A memory etched,
Another stretched.
Re-remembering the scent,
Re-finding it’s lost place,
Among the other million times,
Of similar days.
But you should,
For you’re the only one,
And nobody else can,
Speak the same tongue,
Utter the same words,
Feel the same loss.
And for memories,
Of lost friends,
And forgotten lovers,
For the existing colours,
And the ones unseen,
For the foreseen memories,
And forgotten days,
For the love you felt,
And the one which hurts.
You need to get it out.
Breathe into life those words.
Give them life,
And your soul.
Become immortal.
Conquer death.
All this and an unforgotten life.
Start now before it’s too late.
Die a thousand more times,
To relive a single memory.
Tell them all,
Show it to them,
Make them live though it,
Scream it out loud,
Create a world,
A universe,
A life they will all relive,
Though you.
In your memories,
And mistakes.
And myriad of fantasies.
And so I must.
To keep them all alive.

Through these words.

Pink

I loved you.
More so unknown than I could ever tell you.
I did tell you.
I know that you knew.
I knew that you did too.

It was supposed to be eternal,
You and I.
Doing what we do,
across time and space.
Being us. Just us.

You were a flawed being.
With your stubbornness and beliefs.
I was too, and still am.
But it was our little world,
and us against everything else.

I picked you over everyone else,
sometimes even myself.
I truly loved you.
You were my first and my last.
You still are.

Every memory I have is shared.
With you.
All our firsts,
and our lasts.

I miss you Pink.
More than ever.

I am sorry,
I should have been there.
I am sorry I couldn't be better.
I am sorry.

Your memories are all I have,
Our times together.
I do not know what this life is without you.
It hurts.
Terribly.

Everyday is a reminder of something we did.
You are always there.
You will always be here with me.
Forever.

You are the only one pink,
and I cannot forgive myself,
I wish we could hang again.
Like we used to.

I wish I could talk to you,
for hours, and speak about nothing.
I wish you could be here,
with me.

Who do Gods worship?

Did I forgive my forefathers?

For who’s sins I am not aware of.

Or did my chest swell with pride,

For their virtues outlived their memories.

And about my progeny, I wonder.

What will they hear about me?

Do I still have time to right the wrong?

Or be human and forgotten?

Will I be remembered as a great poet?

Or a good human being?

Or a selfish human struggling to survive.

Maybe it is the choice I make.

Each day, every hour, every minute. 

I don’t atone for the sins of the ones before me 

I don’t believe anyone else will for mine.

For I am a mortal,

In the long bloodlines of immortal men.

Seeking atonement for the ones before.

Gardien des étoiles

I have watched eternity,

Since before the birth of time,

As a voyeur of creation,

and the protector of the void.

I have seen everything,

from the tiny specs of dust,

in the aftermath of cosmic annihilations,

to the creation of life,

and its eternal struggle in vain.

I am alone in this quest,

to wait out time,

and the other constructs,

and observe from a distance.

And I remain eternal,

watching one race conquer another,

and be conquered in-turn 

by yet a superior one.

With no desire to influence,

no action consequential,

no life worth saving,

no heaven worth living,

I witness it all.

The sentient call me,

'Gardien des étoiles'',

Guardian of the stars.

Mortals craving meaning,

Mystifying the unknown.

I am the all powerful,

for nothing has power over I,

I am your conscience,

a creation of another fool,

trapped in a time loop.

How dare you question my existence?,

For I was here, and I will be,

long after the end of time,

witnessing the birth of another.

 

Cosmic High

Do not worship this mortal body,
for I want you to hold my soul.
The idea that we're twin souls of a whole,
created by a cosmic fault.

I long for you lover,
in more ways than known to man.
For we do not belong here,
not in this restrained land.

And I want you to know,
I want you to feel this,
this energy that flows through me,
making me crave your soul.

I cherish your love,
your eternal adoration,
for this mortal damnation,
will never hold us long.

We would unite,
and stars would die,
and universes be reborn,
with this cosmic high.

Begin again II

I am in a different life,

In a different time space continuum,

Creating new as I destroy the old,

No not the old, but the would have been,

I ran from the eventuality,

Tried to wrestle my fate from the being,

Forged new alliances,

And fought new demons,

But as the sun sets,

And the horizon approaches,

I try once again to slow it down.

Take the last breath of life.

Life is catching up again,

Making me dance to its tune,

My Vision is blurring again,

The past repeating pain.

Do I make the same mistakes?

Do I have a choice this time?

You wouldn’t know.

Neither do I. 

But this endless circle consumes us all,

Creating us all, destroying our soul.

a day forward at a time in the future,

A day back, into our past.

Later.

Let’s not talk anymore,

Share no more ideas,

Forget the other’s words,

Fade away the memories.

Bury them deep,

Deeper than your repressed memories.

Erase the other’s presence

Wipe the past, the present,

and forgive the future.

Live, survive and be reborn.

In another time, another place,

to recreate, this moment,

and change nothing, not a thing.

Just us, in each other’s arms,

thoughts, memories and laughter.

Let’s exist, a little later,

in simpler times, and

a forgiving universe.

Fire

We met in chaos
With your world
half burning Into mine
Half consuming lust
Almost lovers loved
Separated by bodies
Mortals playing gods
In momentary haze
Their world screaming
Ours holding still

If I'd reach for you
Would you still exist
Would you consume
And let me
Or would you disappear
Into the night
As Another creature
All suffocating cage
Living with fire
Within fire, a fire

Surreal

I still search for you,
on every face i see,
in the lost cities,
in a forgotten time.
I see your shadows,
almost in my grasp,
losing at the sight,
every other night.
Yet you tease me,
giving me just enough,
keeping me hooked on,
making me believe.
I search in the cracks,
I break things to see,
I hope to find you,
and yet I wish I don't.
You will always exist,
forever and eternal,
at the outer edges of my reach,
bordering reality.
Will I ever find you,
or walk straight into you,
in a crowded place,
looking lost.
You will never let me,
your existence is transient in this realm.
But I will look for you,
I will look into your eyes,
hold you,
kiss you,
and forever want to forget i did.
because your existence negates mine,
we don't belong together,
we communicate through the cracks,
through unspoken words,
in imaginary places.
I will never have you,
but I will look for you.
In places, on faces.
I will look for you,
In worlds that do not exist.
and feelings that never did. 

One.

The answer was within.
At the center of the puzzle.
At the end of the ouroboros,
The end at the beginning,
And beginning at the end.
I marvel at the moment,
How soon I'm going to reset again,
Make myself forget,
To try hard to remember again.

I am the enlightened one,
At the center of the universe,
I am everything. I am nothing too.
I am the puppet master,
Letting the strings pull me,
It's too easy to control.
Let it out of your grasp.
Create to be undone,
By the creation of one.
Envied, envisioned, engulfed,
Senses enslaved to one.
And submit to none,
Because it's all in you,
You are the one.

Enlightenment

I am on my own.
I am the centre of my universe.
I create and destroy everything around me.
I see. I feel. I touch. I exist.
It is my fears that manifests these illusions.
Life is an illusion hiding behind our senses.
Nothing exists. You create it all.
I am the creator. I am the eternal being.
I created god to stay humble.
and the devil, to embrace my self.
I created the forbidden sins,
to want to sin.
I created ambition to sustain this dream.
Now I question if I am alone.
Does it all exist because I do?
Then what is on the other side?

Tat-tvam-asi

I am black as the night.
All encompassing darkness.
A consciousness awake.
A Life consumed.

I am broken once again.
Almost whole.
Almost white.
Scattered once again.

I am at the centre.
I am the center.
This universe exists through me.
I am this Universe.
And the Next.

As I am everything else in it.
And beyond it.

The creator and the destroyer.
The actor and the audience.
The master and the slave.
The book and its author.

I am It,
And It is I.

Apocalypse. Reset.

Let it all burn.

Desire, Ambition, Passion, Love.

Nothing survives.

No, not even hope.

Creation with death.

Destruction with hope.

Take it all away.

Strip them all.

None survives.

No Gods, No devil.

Nor prayers answered.

Nothing remains.

Everything dies.

A small bloop in the universe.

End of time.

And Reset.

Consciousness aches to know whats at the other end. 

What comes after? 

Is this all that one could do in life? 

Be something close to nothing. 

Be nothing.

The enormity of the universe weighs down on his shoulder. 

A tiny blot,

not strong enough to make a wave.

And nothing matters.

So why try?

Why believe this world will reward you.

And with what?

Does anything matter on a cosmic scale?

Does the taste of coffee matter to another conscious being?

What is taste for that matter?

And matter?

I am letting you go.

These questions cannot be answered.

Not in this lifetime. 

Not by a human.

Nothing matters on a cosmic scale.

Remember.

Our eternity. Yours and mine.

Under this Open sky,

with its billion stars dying upon us,

I will wait with you,

For our eternity. 

Our intertwined destinies,

Spread across the stars,

As stardust on our lives,

Reaching far across the skies. 

Come now lover,

It's time to leave,

This beautiful place,

And this eternal space.

Come with me,

Those stars are waiting,

To be conquered.

And we'll return,

When they all have been.

For this eternity is ours.

Yours and mine,

Under this open sky,

With its billion stars dying upon us.

Broken pages. Incomplete stories.

Memories remain,
Some recent, many past,
like faded old photographs,
Hanging in crowded coffee shops,
Where we had our big conversations.
About the little things.

But we did part,
Like the pages in a book.
To the end of this story.
Let's toss books and burn libraries.

When Clichéd metaphors wet our lives,
Strange ones emerge.
The shadows learn to whisper their tale,
Of how they miss the sun.

And so we start again,
One step and then another.
With memories to forget
And scars to heal.

Are we ready?

What is this life about anyway. It's like a maze that was intended with no final destination. You start and follow the predestined order of things and people. Your choices are well limited within the physics of this mechanism. It makes you feel like you're in a hamster wheel. One that is rotating at a very high speed.
One might argue that we have our choices and we choose to be a part of all this. Do you have a choice? If we did choose this, then why is it that we feel so numb. Like there is something out there that makes more sense than this ever did. Like life was given to us to serve a particular purpose. This consciousness needs validation.

I was sent here to alter the set course of nature and events. I was a lynchpin, without ever knowing where or how I served my purpose. That is the one question that makes us wonder. Yes we did play our part, but what was it. How did I influence in sculpting the future of this end of the universe without even being aware of it. 

Maybe I was placed here in this time and space for the purpose of asking these questions. These questions that might be read by an unknown person, who might take the right step towards answering them. And he in-turn facilitating someone else to accomplish his life's purpose. 

I want to find 

the end of the world

to look over the horizon

to the other side 

that is hidden

from us in plain sight

must bring it to light.

Where does this end

and where does it begin.

How do i escape

this loop of time.

Why do I feel 

that there is more.

Was I chosen?

an aberration.

To find an answer.