Pink

I loved you.
More so unknown than I could ever tell you.
I did tell you.
I know that you knew.
I knew that you did too.

It was supposed to be eternal,
You and I.
Doing what we do,
across time and space.
Being us. Just us.

You were a flawed being.
With your stubbornness and beliefs.
I was too, and still am.
But it was our little world,
and us against everything else.

I picked you over everyone else,
sometimes even myself.
I truly loved you.
You were my first and my last.
You still are.

Every memory I have is shared.
With you.
All our firsts,
and our lasts.

I miss you Pink.
More than ever.

I am sorry,
I should have been there.
I am sorry I couldn't be better.
I am sorry.

Your memories are all I have,
Our times together.
I do not know what this life is without you.
It hurts.
Terribly.

Everyday is a reminder of something we did.
You are always there.
You will always be here with me.
Forever.

You are the only one pink,
and I cannot forgive myself,
I wish we could hang again.
Like we used to.

I wish I could talk to you,
for hours, and speak about nothing.
I wish you could be here,
with me.

Gardien des étoiles

I have watched eternity,

Since before the birth of time,

As a voyeur of creation,

and the protector of the void.

I have seen everything,

from the tiny specs of dust,

in the aftermath of cosmic annihilations,

to the creation of life,

and its eternal struggle in vain.

I am alone in this quest,

to wait out time,

and the other constructs,

and observe from a distance.

And I remain eternal,

watching one race conquer another,

and be conquered in-turn 

by yet a superior one.

With no desire to influence,

no action consequential,

no life worth saving,

no heaven worth living,

I witness it all.

The sentient call me,

'Gardien des étoiles'',

Guardian of the stars.

Mortals craving meaning,

Mystifying the unknown.

I am the all powerful,

for nothing has power over I,

I am your conscience,

a creation of another fool,

trapped in a time loop.

How dare you question my existence?,

For I was here, and I will be,

long after the end of time,

witnessing the birth of another.

 

Later.

Let’s not talk anymore,

Share no more ideas,

Forget the other’s words,

Fade away the memories.

Bury them deep,

Deeper than your repressed memories.

Erase the other’s presence

Wipe the past, the present,

and forgive the future.

Live, survive and be reborn.

In another time, another place,

to recreate, this moment,

and change nothing, not a thing.

Just us, in each other’s arms,

thoughts, memories and laughter.

Let’s exist, a little later,

in simpler times, and

a forgiving universe.

Nothingness.

She roamed his fantasies,
free and unbound.
Desire, lust and senses,
all fulfilled, all consumed.
He let his mind run free,
no shackles, no chain links,
no streets blocked, no bridges broken,
The world was theirs, and they took it.
They caught the last train out,
They saw the first ray in.
No stone left unturned,
No sea uncrossed.
She spread like wildfire,
into his fertile mind, empty soul.
He breathed fire,
choked on her desire.
Nothing else existed,
No other universe, but theirs.
No other being but self,
Even the nothingness belonged to them.
And from nothingness they were born,
creating everything, destroying everything,
Controlling everything, Consuming everything.
Once they were done, they went back,
back into the emptiness,
Into nothingness.

Fire

We met in chaos
With your world
half burning Into mine
Half consuming lust
Almost lovers loved
Separated by bodies
Mortals playing gods
In momentary haze
Their world screaming
Ours holding still

If I'd reach for you
Would you still exist
Would you consume
And let me
Or would you disappear
Into the night
As Another creature
All suffocating cage
Living with fire
Within fire, a fire

Away.

I miss you today
It's one of those days
When I struggle to breathe
Where I notice the void
Left behind by you
In my numbing days

I don't miss you On other days
When I have the world
To conquer and consume
When I replace you
With little things

But like yin and yang
You creep back into
Again and again
This lifeless existence
You disrupt my life
You make me notice things

I don't see colors anymore,
But see it's absence
Happiness almost present
Left longing for more
I hear your voice
Each note in every song ever made

And each night
I wish you were here
Every morning I long for your warmth
And all the things
That we left unsaid
I wish we could scream

Surreal

I still search for you,
on every face i see,
in the lost cities,
in a forgotten time.
I see your shadows,
almost in my grasp,
losing at the sight,
every other night.
Yet you tease me,
giving me just enough,
keeping me hooked on,
making me believe.
I search in the cracks,
I break things to see,
I hope to find you,
and yet I wish I don't.
You will always exist,
forever and eternal,
at the outer edges of my reach,
bordering reality.
Will I ever find you,
or walk straight into you,
in a crowded place,
looking lost.
You will never let me,
your existence is transient in this realm.
But I will look for you,
I will look into your eyes,
hold you,
kiss you,
and forever want to forget i did.
because your existence negates mine,
we don't belong together,
we communicate through the cracks,
through unspoken words,
in imaginary places.
I will never have you,
but I will look for you.
In places, on faces.
I will look for you,
In worlds that do not exist.
and feelings that never did. 

Elusive darkness

I come back to you,
like a customer on tab,
in this whorehouse of lust,
with an animalistic urge.
The closer I get to you,
you seem farther away.
lost dreams circling in your eyes,
elusive to my touch.
It draws me to you,
even when I have you,
that I cannot have you,
even on days I've had you.
I crave your soul,
not your body, nothing whole.
I want your broken, scarred skin.
I want you, taken in your sin.
Give in to me, let me have it all,
let me inside that shell,
show me your beautiful hell.
Yet I fear the day,
when you let me prey,
on your elusive darkness,
on my carnal madness.
But do give in to me,
Let me inside that shell,
show me your beautiful hell.

sugar.

With the past gone by,
And future away.
Lovers looking ahead,
Hoping the memories to stay.

The future looming closer,
The longing almost over,
dreading desires dead,
Hope seeking light.

The nights get colder,
With trembling memories of your touch,
The ghost of your skin,
Warming me up within.

Time flying by,
Dreams Coming true.
We're almost there sugar,
It's the time to be.

So hold on a little longer,
Let's fight those little monsters,
Because the life we longed together,
Is one worth dying for.