Longing.

There is a life,
Well beyond your reach,
Yet all around you,
Everywhere you look.
Yet nowhere to be seen,
In happiness,
Hope and longing,
Family and friends,
A good long weekend,
Laughs that cannot be replaced,
Memories you want to cherish,
Places that held meanings,
Times you cannot hold on to.
Wishing you could do over,
Every little thing again,
In the exact same way,
Nothing new.
Just to feel the same way again,
Live those beautiful moments,
Making them last,
Over again.

I miss it all.

Surreal

I still search for you,
on every face i see,
in the lost cities,
in a forgotten time.
I see your shadows,
almost in my grasp,
losing at the sight,
every other night.
Yet you tease me,
giving me just enough,
keeping me hooked on,
making me believe.
I search in the cracks,
I break things to see,
I hope to find you,
and yet I wish I don't.
You will always exist,
forever and eternal,
at the outer edges of my reach,
bordering reality.
Will I ever find you,
or walk straight into you,
in a crowded place,
looking lost.
You will never let me,
your existence is transient in this realm.
But I will look for you,
I will look into your eyes,
hold you,
kiss you,
and forever want to forget i did.
because your existence negates mine,
we don't belong together,
we communicate through the cracks,
through unspoken words,
in imaginary places.
I will never have you,
but I will look for you.
In places, on faces.
I will look for you,
In worlds that do not exist.
and feelings that never did. 

One.

The answer was within.
At the center of the puzzle.
At the end of the ouroboros,
The end at the beginning,
And beginning at the end.
I marvel at the moment,
How soon I'm going to reset again,
Make myself forget,
To try hard to remember again.

I am the enlightened one,
At the center of the universe,
I am everything. I am nothing too.
I am the puppet master,
Letting the strings pull me,
It's too easy to control.
Let it out of your grasp.
Create to be undone,
By the creation of one.
Envied, envisioned, engulfed,
Senses enslaved to one.
And submit to none,
Because it's all in you,
You are the one.

Enlightenment

I am on my own.
I am the centre of my universe.
I create and destroy everything around me.
I see. I feel. I touch. I exist.
It is my fears that manifests these illusions.
Life is an illusion hiding behind our senses.
Nothing exists. You create it all.
I am the creator. I am the eternal being.
I created god to stay humble.
and the devil, to embrace my self.
I created the forbidden sins,
to want to sin.
I created ambition to sustain this dream.
Now I question if I am alone.
Does it all exist because I do?
Then what is on the other side?

Lust.

The skin smooth and soft over your luscious body. With sweat sickly sweet on your brown skin. The little details contoured by its dampness and enhanced by its trailing wetness. I sit here and lust for that body. And feel this need to quench my thirst. I yearn to be consumed by your lust. The way you moved through my fantasies. Caressing one demon and fondling the other. Condemning their sins while making them ours. Words can't quite describe these feelings. You cannot capture the want in its original form. Its easier when we're together. When we let our bodies do the talking. When I can run wild over your forbidden softness. Look deep into your eyes and worship our sin. Let it all fall and shatter. Let the worlds collapse. We'd be burning by then. Up in flames of lust. I'd consume your demons. I'll flame your fire. And you'd burn me whole.